living up to my name

I was flagged down by a woman in Park st S.e.1, ecstatic about getting a fare in such a remote location, i rolled down the window and with a big sultry smile was greeted with
I'm sorry to trouble you but do you have any jump leads" my disappointment at not being a fare, was overcome by my desire to be a Knight in shining armour for a damsel in distress,

As i never had any leads i asked her if her car was manual or automatic "manual" she replies

so i said we could have a go at trying to bump start it, "Great" says she, we got to the car and her old man is sat behind the wheel, "this kind gentleman has offered to give us a push" says she,
at this point i asked the damsel if she could drive, to which she replied yes,
but her fella had no intention of getting out to push, Damsel assures me she is very fit and strong, so both of us get our hands placed on the boot lid and start to push, we pushed it about 100yards to no avail,
so i suggested we push it back into the space it came out of,

It was at this point i noticed a traffic warden approaching my cab so i legged back over to my cab, absolutely Knackered i explained to the warden that i was helping a damsel in distress who was fluttering her eyelids at him, and he just told me to back it up off the double yellow lines so i did, and then went back to help push, we agreed to give it one last go in reverse, pushing with all my might, NOTHING dead as a dodo, Anyway i left them there to get on with it,
And for about the next two hours thought i was gonna have a coronary, Chest pains, couldn't catch my breath, i thought great i'm gonna die trying to be the BLOODY good Samaritan, but it passed over I'm glad to say.

Winston Churchill said"We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give. "

Then later on when i was on my way home in the rain, chatting away to my friend on my hands free, i momentarily took my eyes off the road, when i turned back the car in front was stationary and about six foot away, i slammed the brakes on and slid straight up the Arse of the car in front,

luckily no'one was hurt and there was no visual damage to either vehicle we exchanged details and i went on my way.

P.s Thank God for protected no claims Bonus

P.P.s In London there is a Minicab crowd that go by the name of Karma Kars http://www.karmakabs.com/ they drive around in these old Wolseley type cars,
with both front and rear bumpers covered in flowers, the drivers have them Hare Krishna type robes on, the insides of the car's are adorned with Hippie like trinket's They are a sight to behold.
Anyway being a Walking Talking Living Disaster, i accidentally cut one up, and to my amazement he was hanging out the window giving me the Wanker sign, Whilst Quoting a well known verse "YOU FUCKING WANKER" I must admit it did make i laugh.